Mutated Revenge
by CoolGuy28
Summary: Malfoy gets some interesting revenge on his least favorite Gryffindors. M rated! HarryRon DISCLAIMER: I don't own any of the Harry Potter characters or names!


Interesting Revenge

Chapter 1 Setting Up 

Draco Malfoy smirked to himself. Finally, after all this time, he was going to get his revenge on the people he hated most. The Gryffindors. He eyed the batch of potions setting on the stone tabletop and grinned. He had finished with them over a week ago, but he still enjoyed thinking about the embarrassment they could—and would—cause the Gryffindors.

It had taken him weeks to get the potions just right, so they would have the precise effects he wanted. Even though his skill in potions was higher than that of an ordinary wizard his age he still had had several mishaps and mistakes. But now, it was all coming together.

He picked up the potions one by one and arranged them according to colour, placing them under the table next to his bed. He would do the deed tomorrow morning. For now, all he had to do was sleep. He lay back in his bed and dreamed of the Gryffindors' reactions when they realized what was happening to them.

Next Morning

When Malfoy woke up the sun was just peeking over the tops of the trees. It was early, which was good. None of the Gryffindors should be awake yet. He slowly and carefully picked up his precious potions, took a long swig of a nasty smelling potion, and slipped out of the Slytherin Commonroom, careful not to make any noise.

As Malfoy trekked up the stairs to the kitchen he smiled secretly to himself. For years they had tortured him, and now he was about to get them all back. He had a few targets specifically in mind: Harry Potter, Ron Weasley, Fred and George Weasley, and Oliver Wood. The trio he had never liked from the beginning, of course, all except Hermione Granger, who was growing on him. The Weasley twins had tormented him and made him the butt of many of their practical jokes, and Oliver Wood hated Malfoy more than anyone else, except possibly Harry. But now they were all going to get it. They would all get what they deserved. Even though Oliver had graduated two years earlier he was coming back to visit for the holidays, and Malfoy planned to get back at him then.

Malfoy slipped into the kitchens and quickly found some cups of pumpkin juice. He labeled them, and then poured the different potions into the glasses. Each glass got one potion—exactly. There could be no mistakes. He then found the right house-elf. It was his old house-elf, Dobby, but of course Dobby didn't recognize him, seeing as he had taken some Polyjuice Potion. Now to the entire world he looked just like Percy Weasley. Dobby would trust him now.

"Dobby! Dobby! I need to ask you something!" Dobby walked over, eager to please the brother of Harry Potter's best friend.

"I is eager to help you, sir!" he squeaked. "What can Dobby do to help?"

"Dobby, I need you to make sure these glasses go to the people with their names on it. See? Harry gets this one, Ron gets this one, and so on."

Dobby nodded. "Dobby will of course do that sir! Anything to help the older brother of the Wheezy!"

"Good. Thank you. I must be going then. Goodbye!" Malfoy walked out of the kitchens and began the second stage of his elaborate plan. He slowly made his way up to Gryffindor Tower, until he found himself standing in front of the Fat Lady. She was asleep, but he still ducked behind a pillar as he took another swig of some Polyjuice Potion. He felt his skin bubble and change, and once the change was complete he stepped out from behind the pillar to see—

"Hello Lavender." She turned to look at Malfoy in surprise.

"Oh, hello Neville. Are you locked out of the Commonroom again?"

Malfoy nodded. "I just can't remember the password, I'm sorry." Wow, what a great actor he was. It was too bad he was going into the Dark Arts or he could have joined a theater!

"It's okay. I'll let you in." Lavender turned to the Fat Lady. "Bowtruckle." The Fat Lady nodded sleepily and swung open. Malfoy stepped into the Commonroom with a thrill.

"Well, see you Neville. I'm off to see if Padma's up. Me and Parvati and her are supposed to leave on the train together. Parvati's already down there. Bye!"

Malfoy nodded absentmindedly as he scoped out the Commonroom. The Fat Lady swung closed behind him and he looked around furtively. Nobody was watching, so he pointed his wand at the chandelier that hung from the ceiling. "Ionis!" The chandelier glowed slightly, then returned to its normal state. Malfoy grinned. There were only a few more places left for him to go. He headed up the stairs to the boys' dormitories. After a few tries he found the dormitory shared by Harry and Ron. He cast the Ionis spell on a small candle in the corner, then turned and left. The next place he went to was the dorm shared by the Weasley twins. Here he cast the Ionis spell on a poster of Puddlemere United above Oliver's bed. He grinned and trotted back down the stairs. It was all set. The plan was in motion. It was time to head back to the Slytherin Commonroom where he could pack up for the holidays.

It was a good thing he had left just then, because as soon as he had left the commonroom he felt himself changing back into Draco Malfoy. Malfoy hurried down the stairs and back into the Slytherin Commonroom, then up to his dormitory, where he finished packing for he holidays. He grinned, and raised his wand. He might as well test the Ionis spell…

"Ioni!" A small flickering image, like that of a television screen, appeared before him. It showed the Gryffindor Commonroom, where Harry and Ron were beginning to walk down the stairs sleepily. They would soon head to breakfast. And there, the real fun would begin…

Chapter 2

The Trap

Harry woke up to the sound of people rushing around. He wondered why, for a moment, then it came crashing back: the beginning of the holidays. People were going home. Luckily Ron was able to stay, and so were Fred and George. Hermione had to go home to see her parents, but at least Harry wouldn't be all alone. So far those were the only Gryffindors he knew were staying.

He slowly and sleepily got out of bed, and pulled on some clothes. He shook Ron awake, because they needed to be able to see Hermione off. If they didn't it wasn't likely she'd forgive them easily.

After Ron had fully woken up the two friends headed down the stairs into the Commonroom. Surprisingly, it was empty. Harry looked inquiringly at Ron, who just shrugged. The two left the Commonroom only to hear the Fat Lady snort, "Well! It's about time!"

She wouldn't explain further though, so they continued down the stairs to breakfast. When they arrived in the Entrance Hall it was all busy with people leaving through the doors. Harry paled. It must have been later than he had thought. He only hoped they could catch Hermione before she too, left. They finally spotted her hanging around Lavender and Parvati Patil, while Padma chatted with a Ravenclaw nearby.

"I'm glad you two found it important enough to say goodbye," she sniffed, but she smiled too. Harry knew that she wasn't too mad, so they hugged and watched as the third member of the trio left for vacation.

"Well, I guess it's just you and me, mate," Ron said.

"Don't forget Fred and George."

"Oh yeah, them too." But at that moment Oliver Wood came jogging down the stairs.

"Hey you two, I'm staying here for the holidays. D'you think that they'll let me stay in the commonroom? I've talked it over with Dumbledore, but I forgot that detail."

Harry was puzzled. "You're staying here? But I thought—"

"I graduated, I know. And I did, but I decided to come back and visit for the holidays. Just for memories, see?"

"Yeah, I guess. So… ready to eat?"

Oliver shrugged. "I'm definitely hungry. Haven't had breakfast yet. But hey, who else is staying here over the holidays? Is it just you two?"

Ron answered. "No, Fred and George are staying too."

"Oh, well I'll see them later. I really do need to go talk to Dumbledore about where I'm staying. See you later!"

He jogged off, whistling, and Ron groaned.

"That has got to be the happiest I've ever seen him. And about what? Coming BACK to school? Strange one, there…"

Harry laughed, and the two entered the Great Hall, ready to eat. The first thing Harry saw was that the Great Hall was completely empty, but there was a plate set for four peoples. Two of them were probably for him and Ron, but he had no clue what the other two plates were for.

That question was answered as Fred and George burst into the Great Hall, laughing about something. They walked over to the table and sat down with Ron and Harry at their two plates. Almost immediately four glasses appeared, and the plates piled themselves with food.

"Blimey, look at this!" Harry looked at where Ron was pointing. On his glass was engraved, _Ronald Weasley_.

Harry looked at his and saw _Harry Potter_ engraved on the side. Fred and George had their glasses labeled too.

"Stepping it up, eh?" George laughed. Harry drained his glass in one gulp, and finished off his breakfast accordingly. The others followed suit, and soon there was four empty glasses and four empty plates sitting at the table.

Just then Harry noticed another plate set up at the staff table. He guessed that it must have been for Oliver, since he had told them he hadn't had breakfast yet. He made a mental note to let him know next time he saw him.

Next time just happened to be while they were leaving. They ran into Oliver on their way out of the Great Hall, and Harry told him about his plate.

"Thanks Harry. I should go and eat then. Oh yeah, Dumbledore says I can stay in the Commonroom while I'm here. Later!" Ron rolled his eyes as Oliver walked into the Great Hall, and the two of them headed out towards Hagrid's hut to see what their friend was doing.

Chapter 3

The Realization

George yawned. It had been a long day, with him and Fred testing out their newest product, Magnetic Marshmallows. Without Draco Malfoy around to torture they had to test the product on themselves, which was very unpleasant. Magnetic Marshmallows were a joke food so that when eaten, the eater would find himself magnetically stuck to the person sitting next to him for the next five minutes. As a result, Fred and George had been stuck together nearly the entire day, but it was a success. Magnetic Marshmallows were ready to market, with a 100 guaranteed magnetic outcome.

The two of them retired up to their dormitory and they heard Harry and Ron head to their own dormitory. Oliver had decided to sleep on the couch in the Commonroom, so he had settled there. George drifted off into an uneasy sleep, where he had many dreams about giant marshmallows chasing him and leaping into his pockets. Eventually there were so many his pants pockets burst, and he woke with a start.

To his horror, he found part of the dream had been true. His pajama pants had indeed burst, but not from marshmallows. No, his own cock and balls had burst his pajama pants, and they lay in tatters on his bed. His cock had to be at least three feet long now, and nearly a foot thick. His balls had grown accordingly, and they rolled around dangerously on the bed. He frantically looked over at Fred, who still lay sleeping.

But Fred wasn't going to be sleeping for long. George saw to his horror that something under the blankets on Fred's bed was growing at an alarming rate. It looked like a large bulge, until with a ripping sound Fred woke up with a start too.

"What the—"

George shushed him. "Fred, are you okay?" He could now see the extent of the 'damage.' Fred's cock and balls had grown too, and now equaled his in size, and what was more alarming was that they were still growing. George began to panic, and Fred asked in a strangely constricted voice, "Is this a side effect of the Magnetic Marshmallows?"

Harry tossed and turned in his sleep, unable to shake his dreams. Strangely enough he was dreaming about Fred and George's new product, which they had tricked he and Ron into eating earlier that day. In his dream Harry had eaten another one and was now magnetically stuck to Ron. The problem was that it had been over an hour and they were still stuck. Oliver was approaching them with a chainsaw, saying "Don't worry, this won't hurt a bit." Harry began to shout and scream, and when he felt the chainsaw touch his flesh he woke with a shout. Sweat poured down his face and he was breathing hard. He opened his eyes and gave an involuntary shout. Ron was lying across from him!

_What is Ron doing in my bed?_ Harry wondered. He tried to turn away but felt a tugging at his… lower regions. He reached down to feel that his cock was pulled out taut at a right angle from his body. His fingers traveled up it until they met with a different body. Ron's body. He began to sweat again. Ron still hadn't woken up, so Harry woke him up.

Ron heard someone's voice whispering insistently to him. "Ron, wake _up. _Wake_ up!_" His eyes fluttered open and they grew wide. "Harry, what are you doing in my bed?" he managed to squeak out. His eyes traveled down Harry's stomach down to his hips and beyond, and he squeezed his eyes shut. "And why are you naked?"

"I was about to ask you that," Harry said. Ron slowly opened his eyes and looked at himself. It was dark, but he was definitely naked too. Why? He hadn't gone to sleep naked. Then again, he hadn't gone to sleep with Harry in his bed either. That wasn't right. He slowly tried to sit up and get out of bed, but something pulled at his cock. "Oh no… Harry…"

"It wasn't me!"

"Haha, very funny."

"Honest!"

"Then who was it?"

"I don't know, I thought you were pulling on me. Are you?"

"Of course not!" Ron said indignantly. How could Harry have even thought that of him?

"Then what is going on?"

"I don't know…" Ron tried to get up again, but felt the same tugging. He gave a huge pull and almost screamed. Whatever was holding on to him had some grip. He pulled again, and fell out of bed. Harry fell on top of him, and Ron's eyes widened as their unclothed bodies met. Then he sat up, and felt for his wand.

"Lumos," he muttered. When the light cast across him he almost screamed.

He was attached to Harry. Not just attached by the hand or anything, no, he was attached in a very… intimate place. He slowly reached down to his cock and ran his hand along it. Harry shivered, and Ron's hand met Harry's body. He finally knew why he had felt that tugging. They were attached. No end to their cocks, they just faded smoothly into one another. Of course that meant that Ron and Harry could only move and stand while facing one another, and they could never turn away, and he felt a strange fluttering in his stomach.

"All right mate, we need to work together to do this." Slowly he and Harry heaved themselves up and stood facing each other. Because of their 'connection' they could only get about half a foot away from each other, and no more. This was awkward.

Ron spoke angrily. "I bet this has something to do with those Magnetic Marshmallows Fred and George tricked us into eating. We need to talk to them, _now._"

Oliver smiled in his sleep. He was dreaming about Quidditch, his favorite thing in the world. Only this time, he was a Beater, not a Keeper. And what a Beater he was! He hit every Bludger that came towards him, sending it hurtling towards the other team every time! There was no stopping Oliver Wood, the unbeatable Beater!

Then he woke up. At first he was a little disappointed that it had been just a dream, but as he sat up he realized he had other concerns. There was a Beater bat sticking out of the hole in his boxers. Oliver scratched his head.

_Why is there a Beater bat in my boxers? Hmmm… Oh well. _He reached down to pull it out, but it wouldn't come out. So, looking around to make sure nobody was watching he quietly dropped his boxers and nearly screamed at what he saw.

In place of his normal cock protruding from his body there was a beater's bat. And his balls were… moving. They were fluttering around like little Snitches in there. Oliver gulped. That was what they were. Snitches… and a beater's bat. Why was this happening to him? Why?

Chapter 4

The Practice

George tried to stand, and swayed at the new weight of his… regions. He slowly staggered over to Fred and sat down on his bed, breathing hard. He couldn't figure out what was going on.

"Fred, what could do this?"

Fred shook his head. "The only think I can think of is the Magnetic Marshmallows. But I don't think that they're capable of doing this!"

There came a loud banging at the dormitory door, and George muttered, "Now what?" He toddled over to the door and opened it a crack. It was dark outside but he could vaguely make out Ron's face. And Ron wasn't looking too happy.

"What is it Ron?"

"We need to talk. Now." George sighed.

"This isn't really the best time Ron…"

"NOW."

"Fine, fine, but get ready for a shock."

"Oh, very funny. I don't think we'll be the ones getting shocked."

"We?" George pulled open the door all the way and his jaw dropped. Standing next to Ron, facing him, was Harry. For a moment George wondered why they weren't wearing any clothes, then he saw It. He saw their strange connection.

"Well—I guess you'd better come in."

Ron and Harry slowly walked in, and their own mouths dropped when they saw George standing their, his huge cock folding over onto the ground. They looked around and saw Fred sitting on his bed, looking equally as strange.

George cleared his throat. "Er, is there something you wanted to say?"

Harry spoke up. "Yes, actually. Did the Magnetic Marshmallows do this to us?"

George looked worried. "I'm not actually sure. They might have, and then again they might not have. It could be something totally different."

Harry sighed. "Well we need to find out whatever it is and fix it. Ron and I can't go walking around all day looking like this!"

"Sorry mate, but there's nothing we can do right now. We'll work on it in the morning, but for now let's all go back to sleep."

Harry's jaw dropped, but he said nothing and he and Ron slowly left the twins' dormitory and headed back up the stairs, every now and then one of them making a face because the other had pulled too hard.

George swallowed hard and teetered back to his bed. He climbed in, careful of his now—large appendages. He lay on his back, and thought about how they were going to get out of this one. He felt his cock touch the floor. Great. It was still growing. Well, he'd worry about that tomorrow. Tonight, sleep.

Oliver had calmed down and decided that it was all a dream. It had to be. There was no other explanation. So he did the logical thing. He went back to sleep and waited for dawn to come and wake him up out of this nightmare.

Ron yawned as he woke up, and he stretched. The sunlight hit his face and he kept his eyes tightly shut. What a horrible nightmare he had had! Though there were some perks to it… He shook himself. Perks? He must be going mad. With another yawn he opened his eyes and closed them again right away.

Harry was still there. That meant… it wasn't a dream. Slowly Ron reached down and felt his cock. He squeezed it, and Harry moaned. Ron withdrew his hand like he had been burned. He slowly shook Harry awake.

"Harry, wake up. It's morning Harry, wake up."

Harry slowly came to, and he seemed shocked to be lying in bed with Ron. However, his hand slowly crept down towards their cocks and he squeezed. Ron flushed and shivered. Harry groaned.

"So it wasn't a dream?"

Ron shook his head. "'Fraid not. I guess we'd better go and see how Fred and George are getting along."

The pair got up slowly, still getting used to the way they had to move. They slowly moved towards the door and up the stairs to the twins' dormitory. As they opened the door they heard Fred mutter, "No, that can't be it. What about this?" and George yelping.

The scene that met their eyes was nothing less than hilarious. Fred and George stood across from each other with their now at least five foot long cocks and matching balls, each twin holding several different powders and potions.

"That HURT Fred!"

"Oh, crybaby. Come on. What about the pickled murtlap essence?"

Ron and Harry watched as George sprinkled some yellow liquid onto Fred's cock. They both looked at it intently, then sighed. Ron coughed a little, and the twins turned to look at the two boys.

"Oh, you're up. Come in then."

Ron couldn't help but ask, "What are you doing?"

George scowled. "What does it look like we're doing? We're trying to fix this."

After another ten minutes of Fred and George testing different sorts of potions out on themselves, Harry spoke up.

"Well, shouldn't we go down to the commonroom? I mean, I'm kind of hungry, and we can't think on an empty stomach."

Ron looked at him strangely. "Mate, you're starting to sound a bit like Hermione. You're scaring me."

Harry grinned, but before he could reply Fred started talking.

"But we can't eat! How are we going to go down to breakfast like this?"

Harry shrugged. "I don't know, but we might as well get down to the commonroom. Maybe there's some leftover food there or something."

Nobody could come up with a better suggestion, so they set off down the stairs. They came upon a strange sight. Oliver was stretched out on the couch snoring, with a very literal wood. Instead of a cock he had a beater's bat, and something was wrong with his balls. They were quivering and fluttering around.

"Um—d'you think we should wake him?"

"We might as well, he'll find out eventually. There's only so many things a bloke can do until he has to relieve himself, and it looks like Wood's in for a pretty big surprise.

Fred and George walked (by now they were getting pretty good at handling their new sizes) over to the couch, and positioned themselves on either side of Oliver's head. They lowered their mouths to his ears and winked at each other.

"One…two…three! OLIVER!" they shouted. He shouted and leaped off the couch. His eyes widened when he saw the twins' new 'look', and he quickly glanced down at himself. His face fell, and he looked utterly forlorn.

"So it wasn't a nightmare."

"No mate, it wasn't. Sorry 'bout that." George turned to Harry. "At least we know it's not the Magnetic Marshmallows now."

"How?"

"Oliver never had a Magnetic Marshmallow, but look at him. It's something else, something we all had. But now, for that breakfast."

Oliver perked up somewhat at the mention of breakfast. But Harry didn't.

"How are we supposed to get breakfast?"

Oliver laughed. "That's easy. We can't go down into the Great Hall, but the house-elves can come up here! Just—here." He put on a robe, and except for a slight bulge in the fabric you couldn't tell anything was wrong. "Now, you four go hide. We don't want a poor house-elf seeing you and freaking out now, do we?"

Fred and George walked over and hid themselves behind a large couch shoved up in a corner. Ron smirked. "And where do we hide?"

Harry pointed at a closet. "What about in there?"

The two toddled over to the closet, and concealed themselves inside. Ron felt Harry breathing on him, and he couldn't help himself. He began thinking of he and Harry swimming, he and Harry dancing, he and Harry… But he jerked himself out of this reverie. What was going on? He was straight! Those thoughts must have been an aftereffect of the connection, that was all.

Oliver walked over to a table and rapped on it. "Ingor!" he called. Ingor was a house-elf who had always brought him food back when he was in Gryffindor. Ingor loved to do it, and Oliver didn't mind providing orders for him.

With a CRACK Ingor appeared. "MASTER OLIVER! MASTER OLIVER!" Ingor rushed over and hugged Oliver tight around the knees. He looked up at him. "Ingor was not told that you were here sir! Otherwise Ingor would have come right away to say hello!"

Oliver chuckled. "It's okay Ingor. Now, I have a question. Do you still bring food up to the commonroom?"

Ingor's eyes grew even wider. "Of course, sir. If someone wants it, we provide it!"

"Yes, yes," Oliver said hurriedly. He didn't want Ingor to start reciting the house-elf pledge. "Well, could you bring me… lots of food? With bacon, and eggs, and… toast? Could you do that?"

Ingor nearly gasped in delight. "Of course Master Oliver! Anything for Master Oliver!"  
He disappeared with a CRACK, before Oliver could shout out, "DON'T CALL ME MASTER!"

With another CRACK, Ingor appeared again, this time laden with trays full of eggs and bacon and toast and tea, and Oliver's favorite, fresh pomegranates. Ingor had remembered that, even after two years.

"Thanks Ingor. I owe you one," he said gratefully as he took the tray.

"Master Oliver owes Ingor nothing! Ingor is pleased to be able to serve!"

With one last CRACK Ingor vanished, and Oliver called out into the room. "You can come out now!"

Fred and George nearly ran (as best they could) over to the table and began gobbling eggs. Harry and Ron took a little longer, and Harry looked strangely flushed, but he looked better once he had finished eating.

Oliver wiped his hands on his robes, which he removed after that and threw them in a pile in the corner. "Well, down to business. What's all this about?"

Chapter 5

The Watcher

Malfoy was so excited he almost giggled. Almost. His worst enemies were now mutated beyond belief, and they had no clue why! And the best part was, he could watch everything they did with the Ionis spell.

"Ioni!" A small moving picture flickered to life in front of him, and Malfoy watched intently. He compared the experience to watching Muggle television, which he had done a lot of in Muggle Studies. He couldn't care less about Muggles of course. He just wanted Hermione to notice him. But she hadn't. Not yet.

Soon she would though. He would prove his brilliance to her and get her to love him. They would be such a happy couple… Malfoy fell into a daydream about him and Hermione married and living a quiet life in the country.

He was soon brought out of it though by another person appearing on the screen before him. A house-elf! And Oliver had managed to maintain an almost normal look as he asked the house-elf to bring him breakfast.

So they weren't helpless after all. No matter, they still had no idea how to reverse the enchantment. Malfoy grinned. They were in for one embarrassing time…

Chapter 6

The Search

George quickly pointed out that since they had no idea how they had become 'mutated' there was very little chance of them guessing the right way to change back. Oliver had suggested that the best thing to do was to go to Madam Pomfrey, but Harry was strongly against this.

"Look at us. Ron and I are joined at the cock, you two have five-foot long dicks, and Oliver has a beater's bat in place of his dick. I don't really want Madam Pomfrey to see us like this."

Everyone had to agree. Fred turned to Oliver. "Speaking of which, what's up with your balls? They're like… _moving_."

Oliver blushed. "I know. I think… I'm not _sure_, but I _think _that they're Snitches. So… yeah." he ended lamely.

"Oh. Well then… I see."

"Yeah."

The four of them sat in an awkward silence until Harry decided something.

"Okay, I'm not going to sit around like this and wait until the holidays are over and classes start again. I don't know about you guys, but I don't really want to be seen like this."

George nodded. "You're right Harry. We need to figure out what's going on." His voice faded off and he got a thoughtful expression on his face, frighteningly not unlike Hermione's studying expression.

"Okay, here's what we need to do. Harry and Ron, you guys need to make a list of everything different that happened to us over the past two days. ANYTHING. Oliver, you need to get dressed and go down to the library. Get us all the books you can find on 'mutation spells.' Fred and I will start working on this little problem."

Harry realized how serious Fred and George were about this. They _never _used books if they could help it. And now they were requesting all the books Oliver could find? They meant business.

"All right then." Harry and Ron shuffled up the stairs, and after only a few awkward bumps they made it back into their dormitory. Harry found a quill and some paper and the two of them tried to sit down. This proved difficult but they discovered they could sit if they both sat cross-legged Indian-style and let their knees touch. That barely gave them enough room, but it worked.

"Ok, now think. What has happened lately that is different than normal?"

Ron shrugged. "Oliver's here."

Harry sighed, but he wasn't really exasperated. Not with Ron. "No, like stuff we did. Fred and George and Oliver have to have done it too."

Ron glanced downwards, then blushed. "I don't know, I can't really think right now…" He realized what he had said and quickly remedied it. "I mean, I can't think of anything that we did!"

Harry felt a flutter, but dismissed it as nerves. After a few awkward minutes the two of them began to brainstorm, and they started coming up with lots of ideas.

Oliver walked slowly down the stairs. He was fully clothed, but beater's bats were big and there was still a slight bulge in his pants. He fervently hoped nobody would notice it when he got to the library.

Madam Pince sniffed when he walked in, like she disapproved of his being there, but he paid her little attention. He headed straight for the bookshelves, ready to put some serious time in looking for books.

Harry and Ron had finally come up with a good long list of things, but they still had to go through and cross several of them off. After some time Harry put the list down and surveyed it.

Extra Quidditch Time

Potions With Snape (Badly-Made)

New Brand Of Gobstones

Weird Food (Eating Late)

Bertie Botts Every Flavour Beans (Goat Milk Flavoured)

They slowly shuffled back down the stairs to Fred and George's dormitory. They gave them the list, but they couldn't resist peeking inside to see what the Weasley twins were doing. Harry's jaw dropped. The room was a mess! There were strange coloured potions everywere, as well as several of Fred and George's new products that they planned to release to the public.

"Now, now, don't look too much or we'll have to kill you." Fred chuckled and pushed the two boys back out. "Just head back upstairs and wait. There's not much you can do until Oliver comes back with those books."

Oliver was coming back with those books. Several of them in fact. He had found nine books total, after enlisting the help of a helpful Ravenclaw boy he had seen sleeping at a table. The boy had sniggered after looking at Oliver's bulge, but a quick jinx and the boy was more than willing to help him out.

He staggered back up the stairs to the commonroom and dumped the books on one of the couches. He climbed up to Fred and George's dormitory and let them know that he had found some books. They came down to look which books he had gotten and took all nine of the books back up with them.

Oliver pulled off his robes—those robes really chafed him now—and settled down on the couch for a nap. It wasn't any use practicing Quidditch like this—he doubted he could even sit on a broomstick. So he decided he'd do the next best thing—dream about it.

Harry and Ron returned up to their dormitory and flopped down on Ron's bed. As they lay looking at each other Harry felt a thrill surge through him and he hoped Ron hadn't felt it too.

All the same though, he couldn't help but admire Ron's handsome face, and his cute freckles coupled with those oh-so-blue eyes…

"Harry?" Ron's voice snapped Harry out of his unintentional reverie. "Are you okay? You look a little red."

"I'm… fine." Harry blushed even more. He really hoped Ron wasn't picking up, because he was pretty sure that he wanted something he could never have…

_Harry's been acting really strange. I hope he's not sick…_ Ron thought as he lay on his bed with Harry. He hoped Harry didn't see his ears turning red as he admired Harry's messy hair and striking green eyes… Wait! Harry was his best friend, nothing more! He couldn't be thinking of him like that! He shook himself and tried to think of other things, which was kind of hard when his best friend was attached to him at the cock.

Harry couldn't help himself. He had used up all his self-control, and he finally gave in. He slowly reached out and caressed Ron's cheek. Ron's eyes snapped open and stared at Harry openmouthed.

Harry withdrew his hand, embarrassed. "Sorry 'bout that. It's just…"

"It's okay."

Harry was amazed. "Really?"

Ron blushed, his ears burning scarlet. "Yeah. I'm…"

Harry didn't let him finish his sentence. Before he could stop himself he was kissing Ron, letting himself melt into him, throwing all his love and passion into that one moment.

Was—was Harry kissing him? Ron was incredulous at first, but began to return the kiss. He had never thought of the two of them like this before, but now that they were kissing he found it was all he could think of. The two of them kissed, only stopping for a moment to come up for air.

Chapter 7

The Explanation

George wiped his forehead. All this reading was tough, but it was worth it. They were getting closer, he could feel it. As he glanced through Harry and Ron's list again his eyes landed on it, and he felt it click.

"THE DRINKS!" he shouted, causing Fred to accidentally tumble onto a green potion. The potion smashed all over the floor and Fred, and when he got up his skin had been purged of all bodily hair.

"Aw man…"

But George wasn't listening. He had already thrown open their door and was bounding (as best he could) down the stairs.

"OLIVER!"

Oliver woke up, looking irritated. "What is it?"

"Where's the breakfast stuff? Hurry!"

Oliver pointed over towards the fireplace, looking baffled. "What's going on?"

George reached towards the juice glasses and examined one.

"AHA!"

"What's Aha?" Oliver asked, still bewildered.

"The juice glasses! That's how it was done! It wasn't a spell, it was a POTION! And it got to us in our juice! That's why they were marked and these aren't. We needed specific potions for specific effects, and we got them. They aren't labeling all the glasses, just ours. Hmmm…"

With that he grabbed a robe and cloak and pulled it on, not caring that his dick hung below the bottom of the robe and dragged on the ground, easily visible. He needed to get down to the kitchens, _now_.

He rushed out of the commonroom, holding his dick up inside his robes. He made his way down to the kitchens and rushed inside. He turned to all the house-elves.

"Quick, I need you to find me the four juice glasses with names inscribed on them! Quick, before they're washed!"

Within five minutes George held the four glasses, and he thanked the house-elves.

"Now, keep going about whatever you were doing."

He made his way back up the stairs, only pausing long enough to push Zacharias Smith down a flight of stairs. The boy gaped at George's obvious bulge, but didn't have time to comment as he scowled and fell down the stairs. George made it into the commonroom at last, and continued up to his and Fred's dormitory. The mystery was over! All they had to do now was analyze the potion left in the drinks and POOF! Immediate counter-potion!

Harry and Ron were still lying on top of each other, kissing when George walked in, looking completely normal. He stopped short when he saw them, then looked at the little bottle in his hand.

"Well, I guess you don't need to be separated just yet…"

Chapter 8

The Teaser

Draco Malfoy had finally worked up the courage to ask Hermione if she liked him. She answered very passionately. Unfortunately, it was a passionate 'NO' with an added slap.

Malfoy scowled as he remembered it. Somebody was going to pay, and it wasn't going to be Hermione…


End file.
